Do you need a vacuum pump, sir?
How ‘bout one that doesn’t bump, sir?
Doesn’t need a guiding hand.

We’ve got many other choices
That respond when users’ voices
Shout “I want that vacuum quiet!”
“Put that footprint on a diet!”

“Make it chemical resistant!”
(The scientists are so insistent!)
Flow-paths made of fluoroplastic
Help prevent corrosion, drastic.

Unharmed by those nasty vapors
Our pumps speed your research papers.
15,000 hours a pop
In between each service stop.

You worked hard to be called “Doc”
Yet you work against the clock.
Vacuum run with electronics
Could make time for gin & tonics.

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